it's not what you say but how you say it

In real, traceable use. Part of the curated seed collection; community review is coming.

Meaning · English

The tone and delivery of communication are at least as important as the message itself.

Nghĩa · Tiếng Việt

phương thức và cách thức giao tiếp quan trọng không kém nội dung

Machine-translated — suggest a fix

Where it’s used: Used American English

Examples

Say the punch line loud and clear. You can even increase your volume and really emphasize the last word. Sometimes it's not what you say but how you say it.

Usage example from English Wiktionary (CC BY-SA 4.0, retrieved 2026-07-30)

Sources & notes

Adapted from English Wiktionary (CC BY-SA 4.0, retrieved 2026-07-30 via kaikki.org).

Common questions

What does “it's not what you say but how you say it” mean?

The tone and delivery of communication are at least as important as the message itself.

Is “it's not what you say but how you say it” formal or informal?

No register label has been reviewed yet — treat it as neutral and check the usage notes above.